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FAKE BIO:
John was raised by wolves in the frozen tundra of Alaska. The runt of the litter, John was often abandoned by his family and left for dead. To his parents' dismay, John always found his way back. To celebrate his twelfth birthday, he was set adrift on an ice floe where he was never heard from again.
Until 3 days later when he was heard on the subways of New York shouting profanities. For the next 6 years, John took to the Broadway stage, which lead to many an arrest as he would often take to the stage while a performance was underway.
At the age of 18, John reinvented himself yet again—this time as the steel drum player in a calypso band. The "Belafonte Syndrome" provided John legions of fans, two Latin Grammys, and millions of dollars which he used to support his glue-sniffing habit.
Now 30%2, John sets his sights on conquering the world of television. Inspired by the oral storytelling of the Inuits chieftains of his childhood, John wants to make shows that are long, meandering and at times pointless.
REAL BIO:
John was raised in Tucson, Arizona. Growing up, John developed a love for writing and the arts, which his parents thankfully encouraged. At the same time, a deep appreciation for television—particularly classic television—was cultivated.
In December 2005, John received his Master of Arts in Communication from Regent University. In January of 2006, he began a new job with the Christian Broadcasting Network as an Assistant Director. It was also in January where John and his business partner Todd formed Vertical Hold Productions—finally giving John the opportunity to combine his two loves: television and telling people what to do.
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